Jean Edelstein on the difficulty for women to write about sex:
It is true, I think, that some women find it harder to write about sex
than their male counterparts – I know I find it difficult, and I'm
pretty sure that it has a lot to do with the fact that readers are
informed by the sexual double standard when they react to sex writing:
men seem to be able to do it with impunity, as confirmation of their
virility, whereas women who write well about sex are assumed to be
somewhat loose living. I can't deny that this affected my decisions
when it came to writing the chapter about sex in my book – and it took
me twice as long as the other chapters, such was the challenge of
hitting the right tone, neither prudish nor graphic. Perhaps I'd have
been less sensitive if I'd been a man - but then again, perhaps the end
result would have been less useful to readers, many of whom also
struggle with the inherent ambivalencies of sex.
I'm wondering if the problem is that women aren't allowed to write about bad sex or rather to write badly about sex without it becoming a statement not just about their femininity (frigidity or wantonness) , but also their ability as a writer.
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